6 days postop

Well here I am finally banded, yay! :)

I went in for surgery at 7am Tuesday Sept 30th, my hubby took me over. We signed all the paperwork and gave my copay. We went upstairs into the new tower, which was all very new and nice looking. The woman at the desk was very friendly and I was called back without waiting more than 5 minutes. I first had to go back without my husband which made me sad, I was so nervous and being with him was the only thing making me feel calm. They had me come back and first thing was to weigh me, I commented that my scale had broken the day I started my preop diet so I had no clue what I had lost this month. It always weighs in kg, so at first I still had no clue lol so she pressed lbs and it converted, I was so happy I had been saying my prayers the night before and I asked God for a specific number and I swear to you that is exactly what I weighed! It put me down 17 pounds from my last office visit, making me down a total of 75 pounds since February when this journey began :) What a powerful number that was for me to hear, it made me very happy and took some of my nerves away. I had to give a UA to be sure I wasn't preggers, and I was negative. So they had me strip down into the hospital gown and had me wipe my skin with these new cloths in wrappers I had never seen before. One for each arm and then another for my chest and stomach. I knew it was to kill germs but that was a new one I had never heard of those before, they left my skin all sticky it was weird. I laid down and waited for them to come back to me. They put in my IV and gave me my anti-nausea patch because I warned them my body hates anesthesia with a passion. Finally they let my hubby come back.

We sat and waited for a little while because I guess there was some accident on the freeway so the surgeon and anesthesiologist were late. The nurses were not too happy with late doctors so that was a little unsettling that they were late. But really I don't think we waited too long. A doctor introduced himself as my surgeons assistant, a man I had never met before. Then my surgeon got there I was so happy to see him a familiar face. He was happy with my weightloss and was all business ready to get the surgery going. I said bye to my hubby and they wheeled me over to the surgery room, just before the door opened my anesthesiologist put something in my IV and said it would help relax me, and that it did I was starting to feel a little out of it but they had me scoot over onto the operating table. Such a big cold white sterile room, is all I remember. Next thing I knew I had a mask on and they were asking me to take deep breaths, I knew I'd be asleep soon. I felt them tie my arms to the table and that was the last thing I remember until they started waking me up. I remember them taking breathing tubes out because it hurt my throat. Right away that all to familiar feeling of the anesthesia hit me, I feel so nauseous and wanting to throw up its really uncomfortable. I was in recovery and every time they checked on me I would tell them I am still feeling sick, I guess it took them 4 or 5 phenergan injections to make it stop which those made me so drowsy I don't remember much. They traded off nurses and I was starting to feel a little more alive and less zombie, she was a sweet little thing. I told her I really wanted to see my husband, but he wasn't allowed in the recovery room, she was looking at my discharge instructions and it said I had to drink like 16oz of water before I could leave. But only 1 oz at a time and all staggered apart, she realized this would keep me awhile. So she put me in a little area off of the recovery room so my husband could come back and see me.

He came back with my sister in law, I guess I had no idea how long it had been but I had been back here awhile so she came to keep him company. I sipped on my water, was still very drowsy from all the phenergan. So talking to her was hard but all I wanted was to go home and go to sleep in my own home. Finally I had drank enough so that they could discharge me. It was a rough trip home thank goodness for my husband he helped me so much to get me home and on the couch as easy as possible. Was nice to be home so I could start the real healing process at home. He had to leave back to work that night and I didn't realize how bad I would feel so my uncle brought me over to my moms house the next day so she could keep an eye on me while she worked. I just slept most of the day at her house as I had such a hard time sleeping at mine the night before sitting up on my couch was not the best place to sleep. After that the anesthesia was starting to finally leave my system so I was feeling like myself again. I worked on drinking as much as I could handle so I didn't get dehydrated. Was hard the first few days but after that the swelling must have gone down because it was a lot easier. The physical pain has really lingered  a lot longer than I expected. I am pretty sore on my left side where the port is plus the gas pains from the gas they put in during surgery is no joke.

Today is day 6 and I am planning on trying to work at least a half day tomorrow. I know it sounds whiney since I work at home but it can be so painful to sit up at my desk I don't know if I will make it a whole day or not. But I am going to try, I missed out on work today and a gold canyon meeting so hoping to wake up tomorrow and get back into the swing of things. Thanks for all the well wishes and support from all of you. Love you!

xoxo,
Emily

Today is the day!!

Just wanted to get to document my feelings before surgery. Today is the big day, I slept surprisingly well but did wake up at 4am and wasn't able to go back to sleep. The boys were dropped off to my mom last night, and my hubby is on his way home so I was home alone last night. I was so nervous last night, but this morning the nervousness is starting to wear off and just excitement and the feeling of "lets do this" is kicking in haha :) Took off all my jewelry which feels so weird so naked without my wedding ring and earrings lol I have to be sure not to eat or drink anything but I have to be at the hospital at 7am so shouldn't be too bad. I took the rest of the week off of work, I have my bed set up downstairs for when I come home, don't think I will know what to do with a week off. I am hoping for an easy recovery just lots of rest, luckily I have such an awesome family the boys are set for rides to and from school, they even start their fall break this week so they are off Thursday and Friday, so if everything happens for a reason and this being pushed back, having them off those 2 days really makes a big difference. I am so curious what I will weigh today! My scale has been broken since I started my preop diet, I am so nervous that I have lost enough weight that my surgeon will be happy. But I have been so strict this past 2 weeks I have not eaten a single bite of anything I am not supposed to so I have to have lost right? Got all my meds filled took 3 doses of 2 different antibiotics yesterday, I have my anti nausea patches, liquid pain killer, and my lovely blood thinner injections. Yep injections not super excited about that lol 14 days of it too! Hoping that goes smoothly I am terrified to do it. Well not much else to say but I wanted this to look back on to remember this feeling hours before being banded and being in the next phase of this weightloss journey. As always thanks for reading!

Xoxo,
Emily

Scratch that, let's make it September 30th

Yep that's right they changed the date on me :( Boo!! I guess the normal scheduler was off on the day of my appointment so they booked me a day my surgeon was open but not the operating room, yeah bummer. So its pushed back a full 2 weeks. Now I am going to be completely honest to keep myself accountable, I fully had a pity party Emily weekend lol Now they had told me because I have so much weight to lose that it would be a good idea to start that preop diet now so that would mean a whole month instead of 2 weeks! Yeah I cried for at least 20 minutes, I was heart broken. It was like the amount of self pep talking I had done and was on day 3 of the preop diet, just like shook my whole world. Sounds silly writing about it now but its how I felt in the moment. So I let myself enjoy a few treats this weekend savoring that it may be the last time I eat certain foods, still kind of surreal to be completely honest. But I am back on it today I am convinced I am singly handedly supporting shamrock farms with the amount of rocking refuels I have been drinking lol I did get the go ahead from my nutritionist that I can have mustard so I have been doing a lot of turkey lunchmeat and mustard. Breakfast if I have time has been scrambled egg whites with turkey lunchmeat salt and pepper. Chicken breast, chicken breast, and more chicken brest for dinners lol I plan on meal prepping tonight and doing different seasonings for chicken so I can grab a bag heat it up and not have to fuss. So just an update surgery is Sept 30th 8am check in at 6. Still a Tuesday so my hubby will be with me and I only had to take 4 days off work. I did put on a few pounds from this weekends pity party theme but I am back at it full force today going to stick to the diet and hit the gym, will be excited to see what I can accomplish! Thanks for reading all!
xoxo
Emily

Sept 16th 2014. the day my life will change

Hello again! :) As you can tell from the title of this post, I have set a date, for what you ask well my surgery of course! haha :) I went into see my doctor yesterday and it was considered my official preop appointment aggghhhh so exciting! I first went in and weighed, I lost another 6 pounds bringing my total to 57 pounds lost! I was hoping for more but I am not about to complain! I first met with a nurse who checked vitals and all that fun stuff. Then I met with their financial person, she will be the one submitting my claim to insurance to be sure they cover my surgery. There is so much documentation that they require in order to prove need for the surgery. So at this point they need my sleep study results, surgery clearance from my PCP, as well as 5 years of documented weights. So I have 2009 and 2013 covered, but that leaves 2010, 2011 and 2012 so my PCP better have that documentation or I am going to be so mad! I guaranteed my dr office that I will track down all that paperwork and get it to them so they agreed to go ahead and get me scheduled. They set the date for September 16th at 7am, check in will be at 5am. It falls on a Tuesday so I am hopeful my hubby will be there with me as I really want him there. My nutritionist explained to me about my preop diet which should help me lose the rest of the weight my surgeon wants me too. Then I met with my surgeon he said he is thrilled with my progress and said he knows I will continue to do well so it makes me happy to hear his confidence in me. I am a little nervous but I have full trust in my surgeon as far as that is concerned. I know from past experience my body does not respond well to anesthesia so I am not looking forward to that part. To tell you the truth the actual surgery is the least of my worries its the diet plan that makes me a little nervous. My preop diet begins 2 weeks from surgery so 6 days from now, I am to follow a strict diet of the following:
*no fruits or vegetables
-protein shakes no limit
-plain chicken breast no sauce or skin
-egg whites
-water packed tuna
-turkey
-seasoning - herbs salt and pepper
-broth
-sugar free popsicles
-sugar free jello
-Cystal light or smiliar low cal no sugar drinks
-water
-decaf coffe or tea
-skim or soy milk, unsweetened almond milk
-torani sugar free syrups

Which I am sure for the first few days wont seem so bad but 2 weeks it will probably get old haha

This is specifically designed to shrink my liver and lose abdominal weight as these issues would make surgery difficult and he said safety is number one if the liver is still too enlarged he will not perform surgery. So it is vital that I am strict with adhering to this food plan.

Post surgery is its own animal haha After surgery all I can do is just try and sip on liquids all day long. The pouch they created will be swollen and it will be hard to sip more than one ounce every 5 minutes. So the day 1-4 diet is clear liquids: water, broth, ensure clear, sugar free popsicles and crystal light.

After that 4 days stage one begins and there is to be no food consumed this week. I can begin protein shakes, mixed only with water, skim milk, or any sugar free mix so I will need to get creative there haha I can have broth, sugar free water substitutes. sugar free popsicles, sugar free jello and water. They have it spelled out every 30 try and take in 5 oz of liquid so I do not get dehydrated, so literally my whole week will be focused on try to get liquids down.

Second week begins stage 2 its called the mushy stage yum right??
I can then have low fat yogurt, protein powder with yogurt or pureed fruit, blended vegetables, V-8, 100% fruit juice, unsweetened blended fruit like applesauce, oatmeal, blended low fat soups, mashed potatoes, blended peas or creamed corn, baby food (the meats yuck!!) scrambled eggs mashed well, low fat cottage cheese, blended water packed tuna or chicken. I will aim for 1\2 cup of food or less for breakfast lunch and dinner.

Third week (which I am sure I will jump for joy) Stage 3

Move into solid foods, no more pureed food!! Still watching that I only eat the healthy foods I am supposed to have. Sounds like I will still be fighting with the feeling of still being hungry as I wont have any fluid in my band yet. So I will just need to eat frequent small meals.

Week 4 and beyond

This will be my diet for the rest of my life. I should eat up to 1\2 cups of food 4-5 times per day aiming for 1000-1200 calories a day. Minimum of 60g of protein each day, at least 48 oz of water, and 15-20g of fiber.

It all sounds intimidating but this is going to save my life and give me a second chance at being the person I always wanted to be. Happy, healthy and confident! I want to be sure I get all my exercising in too so I asked and I am not to do any lifting for a month. But can resume my cardio after 2 weeks. But starting the day of surgery I need to walk as much as possible, I read that if you don't the gas pains will be overwhelming.

I know that was a lot of info and I hope it wasn't too boring, but I wanted my family and friends to be aware of what I am going through, because there is so much going on and I want to keep everyone in the loop. And maybe this will help someone who might read this someday and maybe wanting to consider weightloss surgery. I know I need to start working on eating slower, taking smaller bites and chewing very well. They suggest you use kid sized utensils to help remind you.

I thank you again so much for your support it means the world to me, you all give me strength and hope and most importantly love and for this I thank you. For the people who believed in me before I started believing in myself. I love you!

Xoxo
Emily

Also in case anyone isn't sure what this procedure is and how its performed I found this video on YouTube and it gives a good explanation :)

What Is Lap Band Surgery

Getting excited!!!

Hello!! :) I had my monthly check-in with my nutritionist and surgeon yesterday. I lost another 10 pounds which puts me down 51 pounds in total!! YAY I am so proud of myself, I would have never thought I could lose that much on my own! They still want me down 30 more pounds before surgery, but if I can lose another 10 pounds this month, then once I am on the preop diet I should lose very quickly like 20 more pounds, we are hoping, so my nutritionist Mike said he will just have me come in a few days before surgery and weigh me in and if I'm am at least within a few pounds of my goal I will be good to go! So next month will be my official end of the 6 months of supervised diet I am required to do, and he said leave 1 1\2-2 hours for my next appointment because it will be my preop appointment!!! I cant believe it, that means I will be scheduled with a date next month!! So I may be having surgery in September-October! Just right around the corner! Wow that was a lot of exclamation points, yikes, but I am just that excited!! lol (oh and he took my official "before" picture for pre surg, I hope I get to be one of the patients with their before and after pics on the wall!!)

This past month had some rough patches for me to be honest. I had a run in with some oreos this month and it wasn't pretty lol Of all the junk I used to eat Oreos were never a fav, so it was so random that is just what I was craving for over a week. So I bought 2 packs, because there were so many good flavors I couldn't decide on one. Haha in case you're wondering they were Reece's and birthday cake flavors, and yes they tasted as magical as they sounded in my head. But I found that I had a really hard time eating they suggested portion, which was 2 cookies, um really?! 2?! So yeah I did have help from my kiddos and hubby but both packs were gone in 2 days :\ I did make myself log all that I ate to keep accountable and have something to look at next time I think that's a good idea. So I made a deal with myself, treats are going to happen its unrealistic to think I will never again have a sweet. So I tried buying the 100 calorie oreo packs, but yeah they taste nothing like oreos good, but not going to kill the craving. So I saw at some gas stations or drug stores they sell a single sleeve of oreos, that way I get the taste but am not tempted to eat an entire pack again! So just need to keep learning and planning ahead.

I know I was so successful this month because I have upped my gym game tremendously! I even did 2 workouts in one day last week!! May not be something I can do at this point every day but I think once a week that would be a good goal. I am maintaining at least 5 workouts a week, which I am happy about. Its only an hour workout and I end up feeling better after so its something I want to work into 6 days a week. I am happy with my routine now, but I do think I could use to learn more about the machines and maybe which ones I should focus on more. But at this point I think any exercise is doing me good so I just hop around on the ones I like. I do 30 mins moderate intensity on the recumbent bike, then 30 mins of machines split between upper and lower body every time. I was even brave enough to get some workouts in alone this past week, I was so nervous but it wasn't so bad I focused and got my work done and got out of there :)

I attended a support group last night put on by my nutritionist Mike and the offices new nutritionist Katy, too. They talked about being more present while eating. Actually assessing through out the meal how hungry am I really am I just eating to finish it all or because I need to eat. Honestly something I have never asked myself before, if its something I enjoy I eat it all because I want to, so I need to learn to ask myself if I need to. The example is when you were a baby you knew you were hungry so you cried, your mother fed you bottle or breast and you stopped eating when you were full, she couldn't make you continue to eat because you knew you were done. So the statement on our handout was "reclaiming that power" and I want to do that, because honestly I don't remember ever being able to. Also ways to choose food so you feel more satisfied, not full. Like have you ever eaten so much yet still feel hungry? I sure have its because your food like say a salad is filling when you eat a lot but you weren't satisfied so you still "feel" hungry. So in plating your food they suggested, choosing 3 foods, a protein, a veggie and a fruit (or dairy), skip the carbs if you can. Then eat little bites of each kind, also varying textures and colors way to excite the eye as well creating a more enjoyable meal. Great tips I thought, let me know if you want to see a handout from our group, I am happy to scan them in if anyone thinks they would be helpful for them :) After group I was walking out with a girl I have made friends with Amy, and then a girl named Katie who I recognized from previous groups a few months back came up to me and told me I looked so different, she wasn't even sure at first if I was the same girl who first showed up to the meetings. What a compliment, just made my whole month to hear that, that its really that noticeable to everyone not just the people close to me. She and Amy also offered me some pants they had lost too much weight to fit into anymore, score!! :)

Well that's my monthly recap, things are going well I am really accepting of this being a life change. This is just the beginning of my journey and I am so hopeful to continue and see what more great things it has in store for me. Thank you as always for reading and your support!! :)

xoxo
Emily

120 days and counting!!

I had an appointment with my weight-loss office yesterday, and I am 7 pounds down which brings me to a total of 41 pounds down! I am super happy about that. I do feel I could have lost more, but I am proud just the same. My nutritionist went over what I am doing and any issues I may be having. I told him my main concern is losing enough weight to be able to get my band put in this year, in case the cost may go up next year depending on my insurance. So he said I am halfway so if by October I am not down the weight needed then he has a strict diet he can put me on which would help me lose 20-30 pounds in a month, he said I would hate it but its an option. Which I said I am willing to put in the work and make this dream a reality. So that would put my surgery in possible November from what he is thinking. So we are testing out taking my calorie intake to 1300-1400 (from 1500) and see if that helps for now, its up to me he said. Crazy to think once banded they usually try and eat 1000, whoa sounds crazy some days I really struggle to stay under 1500.  He also gave me what I consider a huge compliment when I told him how things were going and what I am implementing in my journey and he said he could have me speak at our support group meeting last night as I am doing everything they want me to do. That made me happy. Then I met with my surgeon who I feel I am finally getting to know. I usually don't see him for very long and its all clinical talk unlike with my nutritionist, but this time felt more familiar and friendly. He said I am doing great and he is very impressed. He had mentioned that I am just over halfway there for weight loss, he doesn't look at my weight just my BMI, so he said I would be done with my 6 months of diet supervision in August he said then 3 weeks after that lets get a band in you. Which I could have hugged him for since my nutritionist had me thinking October or later. So felt good he had the confidence in me that I will do this. Plus its his decision whether to operate or not so sounds promising! Its almost July so to think in maybe no more than 2 months I could be having this procedure is pretty exciting in February 6 months sounded like such a long time but its flying by! I did have a few stumbles this month, we took a couple weekends away and food choices weren't as good as I should have. I feel like I portion controlled okay but still made poor food choices. (I still logged everything to keep myself accountable) So now I know if I am going away I need to plan ahead better about where and what I will eat and one treat is fine but not at every meal. I have found when I go out to eat usually I know before hand so I look online to find nutritional facts and decide before I go what I will eat so that helps me from wandering eyes to unhealthy foods. I have been doing well at home with eating and cooking nutritious meals. Lucky for me my family has been so good at loving all the new stuff I am making so that makes me happy. I can post some of my meals and pictures if that would be something anyone would like to see I have found some real gems on Pinterest aka my new bff LOL! :) I have fully upped my gym game too I am so excited and proud of that! Last week I even went 5 days!! That was a huge accomplishment for me! I have noticed too that my workouts are lasting longer, more weight lifting machines and my cardio too. My first day I went I literally struggled to complete 15 minutes on the recumbent bike, and yesterday I did 30 with moderate intensity and it wasn't that bad I was tired but not dying haha. I have been upping the amount of weights I lift too. My husband has started going with me which is fun. So I know I am super fortunate my best friend goes with me during the week and now I score bonus workouts on weekends with my hubby, the gym has turned into some fun time with my loved ones and time to take care of me. I love it! Did I just say that....yep I love the gym! WOW that's crazy to hear myself say but its true. Well that's pretty much all my updates I have for today, as always thank you for reading and being a part of my journey!

xoxo,
Emily

Making progress!!

My check in with my nutritionist was today and...down another 12 pounds!! Making me down 34 pounds in total. So excited! This makes me halfway to my goal to making me eligible for surgery! They were even going through my pre surgery check list asking if I had gotten my EGD done yet, made it feel so real like this is really happening!! I am so excited, I know the lap band is going to be hard and a huge life adjustment for me. I have been doing a lot of research reading about what others experienced, so I am realistic but excited none the less. Lap band is a tool, not a cure. Its going to give me that extra boost to not be fighting these hunger demons, and since I have so much to lose will really make a big difference for me. I am so very hopeful about my future. I can already feel the difference in having more energy and stamina to do moire things with my family and it feels really good. Oh and did I mention its already having an impact on my blood pressure! When he took my BP today it was kind of low and some days I am feeling a little different so he thinks I need to be taken to a lower dose of BP meds! How exciting! Can't wait for what the future has in store for me! Thanks for reading and supporting me on my journey!

xo,
Emily